Best of ME!

Being a cusp Leo-Virgo, I have to go through one or sometimes more than one ordeal in a day.
When someone says 'you can not do it', my Leo side says.... nothing is impossible and nobody can do it but you, only you can achieve anything you like, anything YOU Want!

When I mess up, my Virgo side says, you are a perfectionist you cannot leave something this messy! When I am not achieving something, I am cleaning some mess and when I am not cleaning the mess, I am achieving something.

Life seems so difficult at times, getting sandwiched between these two. But I know all I do is give my best!

The Psittacines - 28th Jan 2012

While I was wandering in the local Zoo (Jijamata Udyan,Mumbai) I came across this wild parrot on a tree.
I couldn't resist the urge to click this parrot.

This was clicked on 27th Jan 2012.

The Specification were:
Camera make/Model: Canon EOS 500D
ISO: 400
Exposure: Manual
Shutter speed: 1/1000 sec
Aperture value: f/5.7
Focal length: 300 mm
Flash used: No

Your comments and critics are welcome.

Memories....

"Try to throw the picture out of my mind
try to leave the memories behind
Here by the ocean
wave's carry voices from you
Do you know the truth
I am thinking of you too" ~ MLTR (Someday)


It takes such a long time to explain oneself that maybe things are suppose to be the way they are. No matter what you do, it wont change.
You can run, hide, but you cannot escape the memories from the past.
As explained in the lines of the above paragraph by MLTR.
One tries their best to get back to their life, to the world they had left behind, by shutting their memories in the deep part of their heart. 
Not telling anyone about it, about the pain it might have caused.


But on every occassion the pain re-surfaces, leaving a parched soul to speak to someone close to you heart, the same someone who you are trying to forget.


And when that happens, you end up blaming yourself for being weak, for being a target of all those memories you were trying to suppress in the deep part of the heart.
And this vicious cycle continue for a long time. 
For some, its days. For some its weeks, for some its months, and for few it is years.


Everybody likes to hear their share of three word's.. for some its, "I LOVE YOU" and for many its "LET IT GO"
Not everyone is brave, but they still try.
As the phrase coined by Herbert Spencer, "survival of the fittest", only those who take things in their stride emerges as a winner.


And winning is easy as long as you dont give up.

Thoughts!

"Don't want your hand this time, I'll save myself

Maybe I'll wake up for once
Not tormented daily, defeated by you
Just when I thought, I reached the bottom" - Evanescence

And that bottom/ground never comes!

Do you dream? 

Have you dreamed of you falling in a deep valley?

Or may be just falling without touching you the ground? 

Sleeping is sometimes pain for few.... Few people do get all these weird dreams.

They want to sleep but cannot, and they end up working late on some weird project (O ya, that happens too often!)

My friend had once told me, 'if you hide you feelings well, you end up flashing plastic smiles alot. And if you bottle up your feelings, you end up having bad dreams'.

Now does that mean that people who have bad dreams, they bottle up their feelings? Or does it mean that they flash plastic smiles?

Wearing a mask on your face, sometimes is good. But letting that mask be there forever isn't good for anyone.

God gave us one life, and if we don't enjoy it, then whats the use of this life?

Thats what I have been trying to tell my best friend... someone I haven't had a word with, for sometime now....

She has been in hiding for couple of weeks...months...trying to forget something she is not able to, keeping her contact to the minimal amount of people who calls her or walks in her house.

Lets hope that she forgets the past which is causing her pain. Lets hope that she forgives herself for whatever she thinks she is responsible for. Lets hope she moves on with the good memories.

Love you MOM!!!

“ And I can’t help falling in love with you....” – UB40

I want to say this to my mother... but she aint around! I dont know how to convey this to her that I love her alot!!!! 

Its 10.00 pm here... and she is in shimla, probably already in dreams!
I remember the time when she would pick me up when I would fall on the ground with a thud! I remember how she would cry with me when I cried cause of my headache. I know how much she has given me unknowingly......................

I love my mother... everyone does but my mom is very precious to me... I wish I could just rewind the time... live every moment when she felt proud because of me...... I wish I could just rewind and live those moments where she embaraced me tight..... feeling the joy of the world!

I love you mother..... for everything!

If today I am alive, writing this blog...... its all because of you!

Salute to you mom.... I love you alot.... and you are one of those things I never want to loose!

'God.... thank you for giving me such a loving mother'.

UNWELL...

"All day staring at the ceiling

Making friends with shadows on my wall

All night hearing voices telling me

That I should get some sleep

Because tomorrow might be good for something

Hold on

Feeling like Im headed for a breakdown

And I dont know why

But Im not crazy, Im just a little unwell

I know right now you cant tell

But stay awhile and maybe then youll see

A different side of me

Im not crazy, Im just a little impaired

I know right now you dont care

But soon enough youre gonna think of me

And how I used to be...Me"

- MatchBox Twenty

Been relating myself alot to this song.... Simply love the wordings!

I have been feeling so lethargic.. so tired that I dont feel like getting out of my bed in the mornings and when its time to go to sleep... I cant make myself land in the world of dreams.... SIMPLY WIDE AWAKE!

I am hating this session of trying to sleep and trying to wake-up! 

WHO CARES!!!

Why do we care for people?

Is it really our inner concern that we show or just a role we enact… a play, to show care?
It is a worrying situation if someone shows so much concern for you. And again, you get worried if nobody cares for you! God made men…. And then he made women!
He gave both of them a heart and a brain each. Men and women, both use brain and heart. But a woman uses her heart more often in her personal relationships than a man.

Not being biased here, but I have seen men being more insensitive towards family matters, wherein a woman will take the charge and solve the problems at home. I have seen my colleagues, especially men, bringing their personal worries at work, and discuss them with their colleagues and asking ways to escape it. ‘Dude I have to attend the PTA meeting at my kid’s school…. I am feeling so exhausted already… I wonder if I will ever go.’….. Wherein a woman takes it in her stride, puts that event in her calendar as an important one and makes sure she is there to attend the PTA without any regret of leaving the job on a half days notice!

Today the world has just one slogan…. ‘Live and let die’…. People don’t care what’s going around them. They don’t care who lives and who dies. They want to live alone and because they don’t make good friends they die alone too. I sit at my desk and observe people messaging their colleagues “hi” and “how are you”… and the colleague is sitting right next to them. Why people don’t take a life seriously? Why can’t people just turn around and say a ‘HI’ to their colleagues instead of messaging them? Just questions on my mind because I see this everyday!

Sometimes you don’t find time to call your friends, sometimes when you have time, you don’t have energy left to talk to them….but you miss them just as you would miss breathing the air under water. But still you don’t end up calling your friends or the one you are missing.

The technology has developed, but at the cost of suppressing your feelings and giving a helping hand to your laziness!!!